WELCOME TO AN EVENING IN THE LIFE THAT I’VE LIVED HELLO TO THE SHOWER I TOOK GOOD JOB TO THE GOOD IDEAS I AGREED WITH WELL DONE TO THE COLLARDS I COOKED THANK YOU TO THE CAT AND DOG VIDEOS THANK YOU TO THE E-MAIL FROM THE NYPL FAREWELL TO THE SWEET WORDS THAT I JUST DIDN’T LET MYSELF SAY SO LONG TO THE MAN I DIDN’T BECOME TODAY HOWDY TO THE SUBWAY I RODE INTO TOWN WHAT’S UP WITH THE PRICK IN THE NEWS SOLID WAS THE EFFORT MADE TO WALK AROUND PERFECT WAS ME TYING MY SHOES THANK YOU TO THE CAT AND DOG VIDEOS THANK YOU TO THE E-MAIL FROM BAM GOODBYE TO THE MOUNTAIN THAT I ONLY CLIMBED UP PART WAY SO LONG TO THE MAN I DIDN’T BECOME TODAY THANK YOU TO THE CAT AND DOG VIDEOS THANK YOU TO THE E-MAIL FROM THE NYPL FAREWELL TO THE SWEET WORDS THAT I JUST DIDN’T LET MYSELF SAY SO LONG TO THE MAN I DIDN’T BECOME— SO LONG TO THE MAN I DIDN’T BECOME TODAY

Well, I went to see the Calder but I had to steal the Mondrian Yes, I went to see the Calder but I had to steal the Mondrian I had to get it for my baby so I put it right under my arm I said, my baby, she’d go crazy if I brought her home a Mondrian I said my baby’d be so happy if I brought her home a Mondrian I asked the docent for directions and I dosey-doed past the alarm Broadway Boogie Woogie, I got to set you free Broadway Boogie Woogie, you’re coming home with me Oh sure I giggled at the Calder but I had to steal the Mondrian Yes, I was tickled by the Calder but I had to steal the Mondrian I had to get it for my baby so i took it on the subway home Broadway Boogie Woogie, I got to set you free Broadway Boogie Woogie, you’re coming home with me And now my baby when she wakes up she’s delighted by a mondrian every morning when she wakes up she’s ignited by a mondrian now i’m checking out a rothko, it is going to weigh a lot though it’ll keep my baby nice and warm you got to keep your baby nice and warm you got to keep your happy and warm

One of these days I knew i’d find you over the mountain or across the sea Out past the pasture, just under cover my Lotusland lover was waiting for me I heard you calling from down in the Valley and so i went searching all over the world place And I got distracted and I grew downhearted But I knew I’d find you one of these days One of these days I knew I’d find you Or so I kept wishing upon every star Then one of these days I looked beside me There you were smoking In my backyard One of these days I knew I’d find you Deep in the desert or up in a tree Out past the pasture, just under cover my Lotusland lover sas waiting for me my Lotusland lover was waiting for me

I was a mess that summer and that fall I was a mess that summer and that fall I still have my tricky these days, you know, life and all but it’s nothing like that summer, I was a mess that summer and that fall And I've had a heavy winter, I really hit the wall but it couldn’t touch that summer, I was a mess that summer and that fall And i can get wound so tightly, I’m like a super-ball but i made it through that summer, I was a mess that summer and that fall And i’d like to share paella with Raphael Nadal I’d tell him about that summer — dude — i was a mess that summer and that fall i sure miss my mother’s voice, wish i could give her a call she was a gem that summer, i was a mess that summer and that fall before you walk to better times i guess you gotta crawl i got on my knees that summer, was a mess that summer and that fall how to assess that summer i wasn’t my best that summer all of the stress that summer it was a real bummer yeah, i was a mess that summer and that fall i really fell apart in fall I was a mess that summer and that fall

I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE DONE IT I’D LOVE TO HAVE DONE IT AND DONE IT WITH HEART YEAH, I WANT TO HAVE DONE IT AND BE THE ONE WHO DID IT FROM THE START AND I KNOW IF I TRIED IT I’D PROBABLY LIKE IT I’M SURE THAT I WOULD THAT’S WHY I DECIDED I WAS GONNA DO IT AS SOON AS I COULD AND I DID PLAN TO DO IT I LOOKED INTO IT BUT SOMETHING CAME UP I THINK I GOT DIZZY OR MAYBE JUST BUSY WITH I DON’T KNOW WHAT YEAH, I WANT TO HAVE DONE IT I’D LOVE TO HAVE DONE IT MAN, THAT’S THE TRUTH I DON’T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED IT JUST NEVER TURNED IN TO SOMETHING I DO I CAN’T TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED IT JUST NEVER TURNED IN TO SOMETHING I DO

IT IS MY MOTHER’S FAULT I MOVED TO NEW YORK SHE TOOK TOO LONG TO FEED ME I WAS WAITING FOR A MILLION YEARS
STUCK IN MY CRIB WITH THE SALTIEST TEARS
 I SAID, WELL, DAMN IT, I’LL JUST MOVE TO NEW YORK SHE CLEARLY DOESN’T NEED ME IF LIFE IS GOING TO BE THIS HARD ANYWAY I SEE NO REASON WHY I SHOULD STAY AND IN MY MIND I PACKED MY BAGS FOR NEW YORK
AND I LAID LOW, IF YOU READ ME
BUT I KNEW ONE DAY I WOULD GET THERE FOR SURE
CUZ THERE WAS NOTHING THAT I COULDN’T ENDURE AND I WENT CRAZY, CRAZY, CRAZY FOR NEW YORK YEAH I WENT CRAZY, CRAZY, CRAZY FOR NEW YORK AND NOW, LATE AT NIGHT WHILE WAITING ON A TRAIN I FEEL THE MOST DELIGHTFUL & WARM-HEARTED KINDA PAIN CON ME, PAWN ME SCREW THE PERMIT, JUST BUILD RIGHT ON ME
I’M STILL CRAZY BOUT NEW YORK ROPE ME, DOPE ME
WORK ME OVER AND MISANTHROPE ME I’M STILL CRAZY BOUT NEW YORK TEASE ME, FREEZE ME ARROZ CON POLLO IN CANTONESE ME I’M STILL CRAZY BOUT NEW YORK FLOOR ME, SCORE ME
SEE ME COMING ON A BIKE AND DOOR ME I’M STILL CRAZY BOUT NEW YORK
 STRESS ME, PRESS ME SUCK ME DRY AND REPOSSES ME I’M STILL CRAZY BOUT NEW YORK AND I GO CRAZY, CRAZY, CRAZY FOR NEW YORK YEAH I GO CRAZY, CRAZY, CRAZY FOR NEW YORK YEAH I GO CRAZY, CRAZY, CRAZY FOR NEW YORK AND I GO CRAZY, CRAZY, CRAZY FOR NEW YORK AND NOW, LATE AT NIGHT WHILE WALKING IN THE RAIN I FEEL THE MOST DELIGHTFUL & WARM-HEARTED KINDA PAIN IT IS MY MOTHER’S FAULT I MOVED TO NEW YORK SHE NEVER GAVE ME LOUD NEIGHBORS

Working on a ship, that’s yoga Going on a trip, that’s yoga Loosening your grip, that’s yoga Dipping your chip, that’s yoga Patching up the walls, that's yoga Painting all the halls, that’s yoga Have yourself a ball, that’s yoga Reading Roald Dahl, that’s yoga Calling up your folks, that’s yoga Sitting with the oaks, that’s yoga Getting good sleep, that’s yoga Breathing in deep, that’s yoga Opening the door, that’s yoga Sweeping up the floor, that’s yoga Getting to the core, that’s yoga Heading to the store, that’s yoga Keeping track of score, not yoga Always wanting more, not yoga But singing a song, that’s yoga Stuffing a kong, that’s yoga Saying that you’re wrong, that’s yoga Dinging your dong, that’s yoga Wearing a sarong, that’s yoga Getting along, that’s yoga talking to your honey, that’s yoga talking ‘bout money, not yoga Egg whites runny, not yoga Side-up sunny is yoga hanging with your friends, that’s yoga plotting your revenge, not yoga Zooming in your lens, that’s yoga following the trends, not yoga getting to the end of the book and saying what you know, no yo, going for a jog, that’s yoga going with your dog, that’s yoga Reach a compromise, that’s yoga Learn to improvise, that’s yoga Giving alibis, not yoga But giving a surprise is yoga Oversimplifies, not yoga Quick to criticize, not yoga laugh when someone cries, not yoga steal a buddy’s fries, not yoga actually that is yoga if your buddy has a good sense of humor and isn’t super hungry… Emptying your mind: yoga! changing your design: yoga! stacking all the wood: yoga! thinking that you should: not yoga! Clinging to control: not yoga! sucking out a soul: not yoga! Slurping from a bowl: yoga! Driving to the hole, yoga! Sharing heartfelt sentiments: yoga! Positive developments: Hell yeah, it's yoga! Spreading your panic, not yoga wine too tanic, not yoga eating organic, sure, yoga loving your mechanic, that’s yoga stick it to the man and that’s yoga Saving jackie chan, that's yoga washing out the pan and that’s yoga saying i can, that’s yoga brushing your teeth IS yoga getting underneath IS yoga going to the dentist, not yoga going to the dentist just sucks yoga’s usually yoga yoga isn’t always yoga sometimes yoga is faux-ga faux-ga yoga is boga But moving like this is yoga And also this is yoga Like skiing with the swiss Is yoga Or taking a piss is yoga wearing groovy pants is yoga long romance: yoga! finding your bliss is kinda bullshit finding your bliss is kinda bullshit finding your bliss is kinda bullshit finding your bliss is kinda bullshit Working on a ship, that’s yoga Going on a trip, that’s yoga Loosening your grip, that’s yoga Dipping your chip, that’s yoga Patching up the walls, that's yoga Painting all the halls, that’s yoga Have yourself a ball, that’s yoga Reading Roald Dahl, that’s yoga Calling up your folks, that’s yoga Sitting with the oaks, that’s yoga Getting good sleep, that’s yoga Breathing in deep

I WAS BORN TO BE A PLEASER SO I SHARE THIS FREE OF COST KEEP SOME BROWNIES IN THE FREEZER THEY DON’T TAKE LONG TO DEFROST

RUB YOUR TUMMY, PAT YOUR HEAD THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD IT’S A SHADY LITTLE SECRET BUT IT MUST BE SAID THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD TOUCH YOUR FINGERS TO YOUR TOES HOW DO WE KEEP ON GOING? HEAVEN KNOWS THERE’S NO HIDING FROM THE FEELING WHEN THE COLD WIND BLOWS AND THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD THERE ARE LONG AND RESTLESS NIGHTS WHEN WE’RE LOOKING FOR ANOTHER FIGHT AND WE’RE FISHING FOR A REASON TO BELIEVE IT’S ALL BEEN WORTH IT INSTEAD BUT HERE’S A CRAZY ALLEGATION, CUZ IT MUST BE SAID THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD CLOSE YOUR EYES NOW, TAKE MY HAND EVEN KNUCKLEHEADS LIKE US CAN UNDERSTAND IT’S A WICKED SUPPOSITION FOR A HEARTSICK LAND THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD IT MAY HANG US UP AND BUST US NO ONE’LL EVER TRUST US THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD THERE CAN BE NO JUSTICE FOR THE DEAD

My baby bird, I know you know, you should not eat a piccolo. So do not eat a piccolo, if you can help it And baby bird, I’m sure you’ve seen that alligators can be mean. So do not tickle certain alligators, if you can help it But otherwise, my baby bird, the world is meant for you. So touch the sky and do all the things you want to do Now baby bird, if you desire to stick your beak into the fire, it’s going to hurt a bit—i’d reconsider it, if you can help it And baby bird, if you find love, then take it, ‘specially from a dove. But not a fascist dove, my baby bird, if you can help it And beyond that, my baby bird, don’t even have a care. Follow your heart, and you can fly most anywhere And baby bird, if it grows dark just listen for the meadowlark, and wait til morning comes, my baby bird, if you can help it And above all, my baby bird, be nice to centipedes They’ll make you laugh when you wind up in the weeds And baby bird, if it grows dark just listen for the meadowlark, and wait til morning comes, my baby bird for soon the morning comes, my baby bird just wait til morning comes, my baby bird